Tag Archives: transformation

Happy Gay Pride Phoenix –

On this grand and glorious day of celebration, I seek to help us remember how far we have come and not lose sight of how we have accomplished getting to where we are!

I’m moved to make this request because, in the last 24 hours, a conversation took place on FB that involved language that I felt was violent. A LGBTQ activist used the terms “racist,” “charlatan” and “bigot” to describe a community leader. I felt frustrated and saddened because for decades the Gay community has been a leader in creating cultures of peace and understanding in the midst of exceptional anger and fear.

We — the LGBTQ community — are the happy people! Using violent language and judging another individual doesn’t embrace the values of Gay Pride. Judgmental, violent language isolates and backs people into corners, forcing people to become entrenched in defending their positions. Our need for equality doesn’t get met. When we use violent language we are hurting others and, in turn, hurting ourselves. Gay Pride – to me, is making a connection – a heart-to-heart connection. It’s all about the love!

I too feel angry, frustrated and concerned when people espouse points of view that are in direct conflict with my set of values. I feel absolutely compelled to act decisively and quickly when I discover a teenager has been thrown out of his or her house or after learning someone has been beaten to death or someone has been shot. I have a need to make a difference and i am so tired of the violence. Can you relate? Today the path i choose is peace.

I want marriage equality. I want equality and justice for all. I want us all to be safe. I want our kids to grow up in loving and life-enriching environments at home, at school, in the neighborhoods they play, the movie theaters they attend and the places they buy their blue jeans and ipods. It is my belief you want this too. Are you willing to choose peace?

If ending violence means having to change how I speak, or finding a path to compassion and empathy for others with whom I don’t agree – I will do that and I will practice doing it minute-by-minute, day-by-day, as the weeks turn into months and months into years until I can be the change I want to see in the world. What steps are you taking to end violence and creating a culture of peace?

I’ve evolved. I’m not the individual I was three months ago, three or 30 years ago. My evolution has sometimes been quick and sometimes not. Day-by-day, I am learning to treat others in a manner in which I wish to be treated. Will you stand with me and open the doors of opportunity for others to walk through as new and evolved individuals?

As an active member of the Gay Community I’ve watched us be angry, hurt and sad and yet have the capacity to rise with grace and dignity and respond with love, peace and understanding. On this weekend, let’s recommit to being examples of a community of peace in the midst of exceptional violence. Let’s be the models of the change we wish to see in the world. Let’s make a choice to use language that connects with people’s hearts. Are you willing to be the change you wish to see in the world? Are you willing to choose peace?

Long Live our Legacy of Creating a Culture of Peace and Understanding.


Leave a comment

Filed under culture of peace, life, liberty & happiness, Living Life Out Loud

A Culture of Peace is Alive and Prospering

SunriseWe started our second class of Nonviolent | Compassionate Communication Classes yesterday and our third group will start tomorrow! Immersing myself in this training has shifted how I view the world and myself in the world. I read differently. I hear the news differently! I feel more free than I ever have! What a joy to have a “life enriching” journey of exploration.

The Quakers say, “Let your life speak.”

Gaining the sight to connect the dots of how, where, when, why hearts are opening is like finding a new pair of glasses! It takes time, many, many attempts of trying them on to see if they fit and being willing to see it through to the end and then realizing within a particular amount of time it is again time for a new pair of glasses – again. Embodying the principles of nonviolent | compassionate communication has been that new pair of glasses for me! A new filter, if you will.

Two stories on NPR caught my attention this week and alerted my senses to affirm . . . the Culture of Peace is Alive and Prospering!

Continue reading


Filed under culture of peace, life, liberty & happiness, Living Life Out Loud, Weekly Essay

Dear Straight People!

Published on Mar 12, 2013
Denice Frohman, Women of the World Poetry Slam 2013 champion, performing in prelims at WOWPS in Minneapolis, MN.

Check out more of Denice’s work at: http://denicefrohman.com/


Leave a comment

April 4, 2013 · 12:06 pm

Self – Determination

Self-determination in you is like the tree growing out of the rock.

Self-determination in you is like the tree growing out of the rock.

We joined together as a community to greet the new moon last night – the 3rd moon “Weighs the Truth” as articulated by Jamie Sams author of The Thirteen Original Clan Mothers.  The evening was a powerful swirling of energy, filled with excitement, emotion, anticipation and individuals doing what they needed to do to elevate the human condition!

During this powerful moon cycle, we have the opportunity to “find the ability to [be,] how to be self-determined. How to feed the positive, not the negative.” How to accept the truth.

Learning about the notion of self determination is most important to growing our ability to “respond to all sides of life.” Finding the truth of what brings us joy, what conditions bring us a sense of freedom, choice and happiness. It is our path of learning to rise above societal and familial expectations and take responsibility for our journey called life. Our well-being is our responsibility. Our well being, in relationship with others, is our responsibility.

We are learning to accept the “truth inside us as well as accepting the truth of the experiences we encounter in life.”

Self-determination as a term is very difficult to describe in this current culture for there are limited analogous examples.

Self- determination requires great commitment to knowing oneself, knowing who we are, why we respond in the manner we do to particular actions, experiences, or peoples’ behaviors. It is important to know our strengths and then be able to recognize strengths in another.

I discovered this more than 20 years ago – back then it felt as though the world wasn’t fair. I felt trapped. I had no concept of being radically free to choose. When i learned how to let go of the past, find forgiveness, and understand that, based on my behavior and attitude, i was creating the reality before me – i found freedom! As a group of friends say, “a new sense of freedom and happiness.”

When i learned what to do when i was acting in a manner that was not beneficial to me or those around me, i discovered how to live the dreams i had, not the dreams of others, or to live a life i thought others believed i should be living! My life took a radical turn.

Today, the self-determination is thought of as a noun and is often used in reference to native people and or countries. For me, self-determination is a verb – it is a beingness – i desire to live in in an environment surrounded with examples of the human condition flourishing. For that to be possible, i must exemplify that which i am seeking both internally and externally.

Leave a comment

Filed under Weekly Essay

Bible Bullies

Our prime purpose in this life is to help others.
And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.
Dalai Lama


Unraveling the internal and intellectual knots and snarls from last week’s Phoenix City Council meeting has been an extended process that finds me straddled between the millennia. Why, in 2013, are we having a five-hour public debate regarding who is or is not a human being deserving of legal equanimity?

Why, why, why – why do I feel I just went 10 rounds with Hilary Swank?

Instead, why aren’t we having a public discussion about dissolving the brown cloud of smog hanging over our city, addressing the violence to which our children are subjected or eradicating the genetically modified organisms that are being substituted in our food?

Last Tuesday we sat for six hours in a city council meeting in the sixth largest city in the United States: Phoenix, AZ. The topic, an ordinance adding protections for gay, transgendered and Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under Weekly Essay